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Post by jake frost on May 15, 2017 5:50:29 GMT
After making those adjustments to Issue 3, the file size is absolutely colossal and might take quite a while longer to download.
Hopefully you guys can live with that when it comes.
EDIT: just tested with peggyoung, she says it only takes 3-5 minutes to download.
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Post by jake frost on May 16, 2017 20:17:02 GMT
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Post by thatstoo2019man on May 16, 2017 20:23:19 GMT
oh geez mega is being a cunt with that slow as fuck download speed
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Post by jake frost on May 16, 2017 20:25:14 GMT
oh geez mega is being a cunt with that slow as fuck download speed Mediafire wouldn't even let me upload the bastard so I'm having to make do : P
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Post by o0HeaDShoT0o on May 16, 2017 20:55:34 GMT
This guy Mal is a cool character. Real cunning guy, but also a bit of an ass, especially for reading Karen's diary. The nerve. I do like how you did that scene where both parties chatted among themselves about this uneasy alliance they've agreed on. Also, seeing Annie flip Finn off got me laughing a little. Really looking forward to see how this plays out with them, and to find out what the deal is with that walkie-talkie Mal has with him.
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Post by Deleted on May 16, 2017 21:01:02 GMT
Really good issue, excellent characterization. I really liked how you kept cutting between Mal and Annie talking, and Karen and Finn, shows they're both kind of in the same situation. Really looking forward to more interactions with all of these characters as a group. Only question I've got is, what exactly was the significance of Mal picking up the Walkie-Talkie there at the end? Like, what was that supposed to mean? Also, I'm guessing this was 100% not intentional, but Mal really looks like Kyle from Outcast. Even has the same scar on the bridge of his nose. I think it's making me subconsciously like him more than I probably should
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Post by Niccc on May 16, 2017 22:01:12 GMT
Mal is a cool guy. And it's cool to see that even we, as the audience don't know what to expect from Finn, so Mal and Annie's concerns are completely understandable.
Keep up the great work!
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Post by Deleted on May 16, 2017 23:02:59 GMT
Thought this was an alright issue. I'm interested to see how this all plays out, but I think the alliance, and the negotiation was a bit too quick. It felt weird. Especially how fast Mal went along with it. I don't feel like Karen really talked her way out of it well enough. The favorable outcome in her favor was unearned. There's this one really great video series on how Tyrion Lannister in Game of Thrones gets what he wants. There are something like four or five videos in the series, but I think this one is most applicable here:
I feel like this series could use some Tyrion in it. The negotiation scene really showed very little of the nuances of what a negotiation like this should look like, and Karen acted like a real Lommy here. At least gaguing how well each character understands how to negotiate and how well they understand how to appeal to what someone wants could improve a scene like this in the future.
Also, not quite as applicable in this particular scene, but this could help with negotiation scenes in the future, too:
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Post by sos on May 17, 2017 2:29:00 GMT
Can't wait for the inevitable Annie meets Mal, Karen meets Finn flashbacks.
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Post by jake frost on May 17, 2017 19:05:47 GMT
This guy Mal is a cool character. Real cunning guy, but also a bit of an ass, especially for reading Karen's diary. The nerve. I do like how you did that scene where both parties chatted among themselves about this uneasy alliance they've agreed on. Also, seeing Annie flip Finn off got me laughing a little. Really looking forward to see how this plays out with them, and to find out what the deal is with that walkie-talkie Mal has with him. He did have a reason to read the diary -- make sure they were somewhat legit. Really good issue, excellent characterization. I really liked how you kept cutting between Mal and Annie talking, and Karen and Finn, shows they're both kind of in the same situation. Really looking forward to more interactions with all of these characters as a group. Only question I've got is, what exactly was the significance of Mal picking up the Walkie-Talkie there at the end? Like, what was that supposed to mean? Also, I'm guessing this was 100% not intentional, but Mal really looks like Kyle from Outcast. Even has the same scar on the bridge of his nose. I think it's making me subconsciously like him more than I probably should There's actually some funny parallels between Finn and Annie, most notably how they they instantly distrust each other in particular, but more stuff should come to the surface in future.
As for the walkie talkie, it's intended to suggest Mal has it for a reason. He sends everyone out before revealing it, so it's a secret. Maybe he's in contact with a larger group of bandits? The whole thing might be a trap, etc...
I've never seen Outcast, so I can't say those parallels are intentional. From the looks of things, Outcast's Kyle is white while Mal has asian features, too. Mal is a cool guy. And it's cool to see that even we, as the audience don't know what to expect from Finn, so Mal and Annie's concerns are completely understandable. Keep up the great work! Gonna blow my own horn and say it's a good thing that we didn't reveal too much about Finn, so it makes it easier to associate with Mal and Annie. Though I think it's also good that Annie's a kid, because it makes Mal seem like more of an unorthodox bandit. Thought this was an alright issue. I'm interested to see how this all plays out, but I think the alliance, and the negotiation was a bit too quick. It felt weird. Especially how fast Mal went along with it. I don't feel like Karen really talked her way out of it well enough. The favorable outcome in her favor was unearned. There's this one really great video series on how Tyrion Lannister in Game of Thrones gets what he wants. There are something like four or five videos in the series, but I think this one is most applicable here:
I feel like this series could use some Tyrion in it. The negotiation scene really showed very little of the nuances of what a negotiation like this should look like, and Karen acted like a real Lommy here. At least gaguing how well each character understands how to negotiate and how well they understand how to appeal to what someone wants could improve a scene like this in the future.
Also, not quite as applicable in this particular scene, but this could help with negotiation scenes in the future, too:
"What the fuck's a Lommy"
I figured someone would have something to say about the negotiation; the goal was to make both parties appear desperate by mentioning how dry Nebraska is in terms of supplies. Maybe we under did that or didn't push the idea enough, but I didn't want to push it too much to the point where it would annoy the reader.
Rest assured, I'll take this into account if/when we write a negotiation next time. Can't wait for the inevitable Annie meets Mal, Karen meets Finn flashbacks. It might be a while before the characters open up, but I'm sure we'll find out how they came to be together. Karen and Finn in particular have a lot of backstory that's yet to be revealed (if you folks have been keeping up with the 'Cedarbrook' namedrops)
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on May 17, 2017 19:09:12 GMT
This guy Mal is a cool character. Real cunning guy, but also a bit of an ass, especially for reading Karen's diary. The nerve. I do like how you did that scene where both parties chatted among themselves about this uneasy alliance they've agreed on. Also, seeing Annie flip Finn off got me laughing a little. Really looking forward to see how this plays out with them, and to find out what the deal is with that walkie-talkie Mal has with him. He did have a reason to read the diary -- make sure they were somewhat legit. Really good issue, excellent characterization. I really liked how you kept cutting between Mal and Annie talking, and Karen and Finn, shows they're both kind of in the same situation. Really looking forward to more interactions with all of these characters as a group. Only question I've got is, what exactly was the significance of Mal picking up the Walkie-Talkie there at the end? Like, what was that supposed to mean? Also, I'm guessing this was 100% not intentional, but Mal really looks like Kyle from Outcast. Even has the same scar on the bridge of his nose. I think it's making me subconsciously like him more than I probably should There's actually some funny parallels between Finn and Annie, most notably how they they instantly distrust each other in particular, but more stuff should come to the surface in future.
As for the walkie talkie, it's intended to suggest Mal has it for a reason. He sends everyone out before revealing it, so it's a secret. Maybe he's in contact with a larger group of bandits? The whole thing might be a trap, etc...
I've never seen Outcast, so I can't say those parallels are intentional. From the looks of things, Outcast's Kyle is white while Mal has asian features, too. Mal is a cool guy. And it's cool to see that even we, as the audience don't know what to expect from Finn, so Mal and Annie's concerns are completely understandable. Keep up the great work! Gonna blow my own horn and say it's a good thing that we didn't reveal too much about Finn, so it makes it easier to associate with Mal and Annie. Though I think it's also good that Annie's a kid, because it makes Mal seem like more of an unorthodox bandit. Thought this was an alright issue. I'm interested to see how this all plays out, but I think the alliance, and the negotiation was a bit too quick. It felt weird. Especially how fast Mal went along with it. I don't feel like Karen really talked her way out of it well enough. The favorable outcome in her favor was unearned. There's this one really great video series on how Tyrion Lannister in Game of Thrones gets what he wants. There are something like four or five videos in the series, but I think this one is most applicable here:
I feel like this series could use some Tyrion in it. The negotiation scene really showed very little of the nuances of what a negotiation like this should look like, and Karen acted like a real Lommy here. At least gaguing how well each character understands how to negotiate and how well they understand how to appeal to what someone wants could improve a scene like this in the future.
Also, not quite as applicable in this particular scene, but this could help with negotiation scenes in the future, too:
"What the fuck's a Lommy"
I figured someone would have something to say about the negotiation; the goal was to make both parties appear desperate by mentioning how dry Nebraska is in terms of supplies. Maybe we under did that or didn't push the idea enough, but I didn't want to push it too much to the point where it would annoy the reader.
Rest assured, I'll take this into account if/when we write a negotiation next time. Can't wait for the inevitable Annie meets Mal, Karen meets Finn flashbacks. It might be a while before the characters open up, but I'm sure we'll find out how they came to be together. Karen and Finn in particular have a lot of backstory that's yet to be revealed (if you folks have been keeping up with the 'Cedarbrook' namedrops) Mal's Asian? That wasn't obvious to me for some reason. Also Peggyoung answered my question about Finn's cat on tumblr, but I got another one: who came up with his name?
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Post by jake frost on May 17, 2017 19:35:17 GMT
Also Peggyoung answered my question about Finn's cat on tumblr, but I got another one: who came up with his name? That was up to her - I let her decide as she contributed the character of Finn. A lot of stuff surrounding Finn & Karen is hers to decide, while I'm more involved in Annie and Mal. That said, we write for both.
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Post by Deleted on May 17, 2017 21:52:01 GMT
Thought this was an alright issue. I'm interested to see how this all plays out, but I think the alliance, and the negotiation was a bit too quick. It felt weird. Especially how fast Mal went along with it. I don't feel like Karen really talked her way out of it well enough. The favorable outcome in her favor was unearned. There's this one really great video series on how Tyrion Lannister in Game of Thrones gets what he wants. There are something like four or five videos in the series, but I think this one is most applicable here:
I feel like this series could use some Tyrion in it. The negotiation scene really showed very little of the nuances of what a negotiation like this should look like, and Karen acted like a real Lommy here. At least gaguing how well each character understands how to negotiate and how well they understand how to appeal to what someone wants could improve a scene like this in the future.
Also, not quite as applicable in this particular scene, but this could help with negotiation scenes in the future, too:
"What the fuck's a Lommy"
I figured someone would have something to say about the negotiation; the goal was to make both parties appear desperate by mentioning how dry Nebraska is in terms of supplies. Maybe we under did that or didn't push the idea enough, but I didn't want to push it too much to the point where it would annoy the reader.
Rest assured, I'll take this into account if/when we write a negotiation next time. In that case, I don't think the problem was the number of times they said it, they said it quite a few times. I think the problem was the weight of those individual lines. Where something like that might have deserved its own little moment, like seeing their supplies, and how low they really were, instead, we only knew because they just say it in a couple throwaway lines that they're going hungry. And plus, not to mention, why would Mal take in more mouths to feed if they were starving? Even if he didn't expect them to last long, they've still survived half a decade of walkers and pain. Odds are, it'll take more than one day of mistreatment in a place so depopulated as Nebraska to kill them. And any longer than that and Mal would have to feed them his and Annie's food, or he'd starve them, which doesn't seem like something Annie might go along with.
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Post by jake frost on May 17, 2017 22:59:43 GMT
In that case, I don't think the problem was the number of times they said it, they said it quite a few times. I think the problem was the weight of those individual lines. Where something like that might have deserved its own little moment, like seeing their supplies, and how low they really were, instead, we only knew because they just say it in a couple throwaway lines that they're going hungry. Fair point. Probably should've shown the contents of Karen's bag or something when they were camped out in Issue 1. That's an error on my part. IAnd plus, not to mention, why would Mal take in more mouths to feed if they were starving? Even if he didn't expect them to last long, they've still survived half a decade of walkers and pain. Odds are, it'll take more than one day of mistreatment in a place so depopulated as Nebraska to kill them. And any longer than that and Mal would have to feed them his and Annie's food, or he'd starve them, which doesn't seem like something Annie might go along with. He hasn't said he has any intention of feeding them, worst comes to worst he'll murder them and take their supplies -- but he knows they don't have a lot. Annie does ground him a bit and her concerns mean something to him, but she still defers to his authority. Excuses, excuses...EDIT: Also remember to take into account that Mal isn't exactly floored by their survival skills right now - they waltzed into his domain as if they 'had their eyes closed' and one of them keeps a diary. They're fodder in his eyes.
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Post by Deleted on May 18, 2017 18:37:48 GMT
Sorry that I didn't find the time to read it yet, but I'll get back to you this weekend mate.
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