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Post by o0HeaDShoT0o on Jun 20, 2017 20:08:39 GMT
You know, this is just me, but when I saw that boy, Austin, in the promo art, I kinda assumed he would be taller. And a bit older. But what do I know, huh? I do like that handshake moment he had with Mal and Karen. "You can let go of my hand now." Heh, poor kid. Noah just looks like he needs a hug. I was feeling just as skeptical about Ray as Mal was when he mentioned his daughter was being held hostage. It's really difficult to trust anyone in this hellish world they live in. Even so, Finn really needs to take a chill pill or something. Really excited for the next issue.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2017 20:30:52 GMT
Hmm... My biggest problem with this issue was the camera work. I had a really poor sense of space. There need to be more wide shots, including more characters than just the ones relevant at that given instant. I also have no idea what the other characters are doing during this time. Like Annie, she didn't speak once in the whole couch conversation. What was she doing? Digging in? Was she solemnly listening? I wish we could've seen the whole room, rather than just close up shots of whoever is talking.
Also, I still feel like Karen is a fairly weak character. She's a very passive protagonist. She doesn't do many interesting things. The interesting things are often relegated to the supporting cast. Like Finn taking Mal's exposed things was Finn DOING something, while Kate just went "oh no dont do that stealing is bad and this guy is testing us." When Ray showed up, Kate was just basically like "oh hello friend lets go help your daughter yes". Mal prepping Karen to end Ray was Mal doing something.
I'm generally pretty bad at explaining things though, so here, here's something relevant:
Karen is still a lot more active than Jin in Rogue one, but I feel like she could be doing more, especially as this series' protagonist.
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Post by Hunter1324 on Jun 20, 2017 20:38:22 GMT
Oh look! My excuse to not study for tomorrow's exam! Pretty nice start for the volume. I like the idea of having a former apocalypse prep-guy as a character. I would defintely not trust him though...
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2017 21:27:56 GMT
I'll read it this weekend. This week is hell on earth and I want to take my time with it and relax while reading. I'll get back to you with a review as always, though.
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Post by jake frost on Jun 20, 2017 21:30:46 GMT
FOR FUCK'S SAKE I JUST TYPED UP AN HOUR'S WORTH OF REPLIES AND MY INTERNET CONNECTION CUT OUT WHEN I HIT 'REPLY'
FUCK THIS.
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Post by Hunter1324 on Jun 20, 2017 21:33:25 GMT
FOR FUCK'S SAKE I JUST TYPED UP AN HOUR'S WORTH OF REPLIES AND MY INTERNET CONNECTION CUT OUT WHEN I HIT 'REPLY' FUCK THIS. RIP.
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Post by sos on Jun 20, 2017 21:35:17 GMT
Jeez no wonder Mal left the guy hanging. A lefty handshake, kid? COME ON!
Great issue. I'm not sure I trust this guy either.
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Post by jake frost on Jun 20, 2017 21:44:53 GMT
Ok here's some bullet points because I'd rather work on issue 7 than put up with my dog shit internet typing that up and losing it again. Apologies in advance if they come off blunt - @zyphon - - I make the dialogue a bit direct because I noticed with the Thrones project that people never seemed to pick up on the subtleties. That said I might go a bit too far in the opposite direction.
- The characters being foils to one another is intentional but perhaps not to the extent you described. This should become more apparent over time.
o0HeaDShoT0o - - I also thought Austin looked taller/older in the promo art, probably because his head was super big. His design didn't change between the promo and issue 5 though.
- Finn has major damage and trust issues, but I think this helps him and Karen survive in some ways; I don't think either of them would make it without each other because they're the extremes of a spectrum.
@rhseemscool - - I realise now that I should've put an establishing shot in the living room, but working with small, boxed-in locations can be a struggle to get the right camera angles.
- Annie was eating the food Austin gave the group during the conversation. She's visible doing so, but an establishing shot again would've helped this.
- Karen might be a bit too passive from a narrative perspective, but some of it is down to personality. It's how she survives - she won Mal and Annie over by being passive while Finn was too active. She's a bit of a... social infiltrator or something. Also she did get the ball rolling by making the initial deal with Mal (and I'll get to explaining why he accepted it so easily later down the line).
- Karen isn't the only protagonist; my co-writer and I call Karen, Finn, Annie and Mal the 'core four' because we've seen scenes from their different POVs already. It's more of a group protagonist than a single protagonist, but if I've done a shit job of communicating that it's my fault.
Jeez no wonder Mal left the guy hanging. A lefty handshake, kid? COME ON! Great issue. I'm not sure I trust this guy either. He did grow up in a post-apocalyptic environment, so he probably doesn't have social cues down to a tee. Then again, maybe he's just left handed. He's lucky Karen's left handed, at least (though Mal is too).
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Post by jake frost on Jun 24, 2017 0:17:36 GMT
Might be a break for a little bit following Issue 6's release (still haven't finished 7). Think I'm gonna take it easier from here on out because I'm not sure I can actually cope with working during the day and then pushing myself to do Haven for the rest of the evening.
So, uh... issues might be less frequent from here on, but it's for like... my psychological well being.
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Post by jake frost on Jun 27, 2017 19:06:24 GMT
Probably the last issue for a while. My co-writer has some irl things, and I'm not very motivated at the moment. Hopefully we'll come back to this project at some point (I did stop making the Thrones one for 3 months and then came back to work on it for a year on a half). Also Crash Bandicoot is gonna take up a lot of my time come friday lol.
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Post by o0HeaDShoT0o on Jun 27, 2017 20:22:48 GMT
I thought it was a nice conversation that Annie and Noah had. And I noticed that comic he was reading was titled "Team Rain" Is that reference of some sort, or did you come up with that? That Grinch quote Mal did made me chuckle. Haha Now, about Ray. Every time I feel like I can trust him, Mal points out how he doesn't seemed that worried about his daughter being held hostage, which makes me feel just as skeptical about Ray and wonder if he really can be trusted. Especially with that little confrontation they just had in the kitchen. Though, I do like that "World's Greatest Dad" mug he uses. That picture of Austin at the end looks cute. Makes him look like a boy scout. I do hope that things work out for the better for Peggyoung soon and that you can get your creative flow back. Until then, I'll be patient. Also Crash Bandicoot is gonna take up a lot of my time come friday lol. Man, you and me both, pal.
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Post by Hunter1324 on Jun 27, 2017 20:32:00 GMT
One of the characters in the Team Rain cover looks, familiar...
I think the scene between Noah and Annie was very interesting, it probably one of our best glimpses to Annie's current character, it also might be hinting at some interesting stuff that might had transpired during the last two or three years (or to Annie's past before Howe's if that's still canon).
And well it was nice to see that Mal in a position to confront Ray without any other characters interacting, I say that I expected him to play it cooler and to not be as blunt with his statements but it worked pretty well.
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Post by jake frost on Jun 27, 2017 21:44:01 GMT
I thought it was a nice conversation that Annie and Noah had. And I noticed that comic he was reading was titled "Team Rain" Is that reference of some sort, or did you come up with that? tbh Team Rain is just some shitty OCs I had for another franchise entirely. I thought I'd re-purpose the art I made for that as a comic here to speed things up, as well as a sort of in-joke to myself. Now, about Ray. Every time I feel like I can trust him, Mal points out how he doesn't seemed that worried about his daughter being held hostage, which makes me feel just as skeptical about Ray and wonder if he really can be trusted. Especially with that little confrontation they just had in the kitchen. Though, I do like that "World's Greatest Dad" mug he uses. I won't say much in regards to Ray. Whether he can or can't be trusted is a theme this Volume, so time will tell. That picture of Austin at the end looks cute. Makes him look like a boy scout. He was one - Ray kind of forced him into it so that he'd pursue the 'family tradition' of joining the army. From what little we've seen of Austin, he was never built for it. What he learned as a scout should come in handy though.
Fun fact too - Austin is actually using Noah's model there. They're brothers, it only makes sense. Also Crash Bandicoot is gonna take up a lot of my time come friday lol. Man, you and me both, pal. So hype for this game Hopefully amazon delivers it on the day considering I pre-ordered in February. One of the characters in the Team Rain cover looks, familiar... Familiar in what way? I don't think it was intentional. I think the scene between Noah and Annie was very interesting, it probably one of our best glimpses to Annie's current character, it also might be hinting at some interesting stuff that might had transpired during the last two or three years (or to Annie's past before Howe's if that's still canon). We'll see more of Annie's current character as time goes on. There's some stuff I'm looking forward to regarding her and her attachment to Mal, as well as her relationships with her new companions.
Also this scene is something of a callback to ITF. I'll say that stuff in ITF is 'canon' until it's stated otherwise, but there isn't really anything that's different. I just want to establish her fresh in Haven for those who are dropping in at this point. Regarding her comment on seeing other kids die... I don't see any of the kids she interacted with during ITF alongside her any more. And well it was nice to see that Mal in a position to confront Ray without any other characters interacting, I say that I expected him to play it cooler and to not be as blunt with his statements but it worked pretty well. He was a bit blunt here, yeah, but Ray's a bit of a prick who knows how to play Mal much better than Finn does.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 28, 2017 13:17:16 GMT
Really loved this issue, I liked the scene between Annie and Noah in the beginning, as Headshot and Hunter said it did give a glimpse into what she's like now.
I really liked the scene in the kitchen between Mal and Ray, hinting that Mal might have a darker past, and seeing him keep his cool around Ray. Honestly, Mal seems to carry a lot of quiet anger, and it's been pretty evident in his mannerisms and the "tone" of his dialogue, and I think it makes him a really interesting character in how he acts, especially contrasted to when he softens around Karen or Annie.
Still don't trust Ray, and his... interest, in Karen's "love life" seems to give me another reason not to. I don't know... it seemed... weird, and he seemed to be kind of provoking Mal for no reason... His whole behavior is weird and off, and it's just subtle enough that it's clear something it wrong, but not clear what. I like that.
Anyway, this was good build up for the events in the rest of the volume. I hope things get better for Peggyoung, and you find the motivation to work on this again soon.
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Post by Shepard on Jul 1, 2017 3:16:55 GMT
This looks awesome. I definitely need to read up on this.
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